For four and a half years I have fought tooth and nail to make my relationship work. Now, I am trying to keep myself together and not go insane myself. I made a decision a couple weeks ago that I need to move on from this relationship. Do I love him? Yes, with every inch of my being. He is never going to make the changes he promised me he would make in the beginning. A good friend once told me 'believe a man when he tells you something, if he tells you he isn't going to change - he isn't'. Loud and clear I hear that now.
None of my emotions relating to our relationship are going to change anything about our relationship.
I am now looking for a place to call my own. I moved out once before and ended up moving back here with him. I am resolute in my decision that we need to cut our ties and go seperate ways at this point.
I am looking for a place to call my own. It is a secret from most everyone I know because I don't want to fall back on my word and let people down again. This isn't the place for me any longer. I know that. Love isn't enough if it is all there is. I will find my way. Eventually.
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